How many times have you asked: "Can I speak to the manager?" in the mistaken belief they are better informed than a lowly employee?

Turns out they know nothing, not a jot. Contrary to popular opinion the management tree is populated entirely by monkeys? I remember my sense of shock when the President of the United States didn’t know whether he’d had sex with a female intern. As leader of the most powerful nation on earth I thought he’d have a better (dare I say?) grasp.

You see; I’m struggling here. If you’re a postman and your parcels go missing you’re expected to know where they went. If you work on the till in Boots and are £500 short in your takings you have to explain. You can’t say you don’t remember.

But something obviously happens to the mental faculties of ambitious people on their rise to the top destroying their power of recall. I’m surprised we haven’t heard more about this from the medical profession (maybe they forgot?).

Large company cheques are issued without anyone above the office cleaner having a clue who authorised them. Employees break the law on an industrial scale without a single director knowing.

I remember watching a TV series once called ‘V’ or ‘X’ (not sure, but it definitely wasn’t a vowel) where aliens took over the minds of humans. I wonder if that’s what’s going on right now? Maybe it’s the reason so many powerful individuals can’t recall what’s happening in their own organisations. They are, to all intents and purposes, extra terrestrials and obviously too scared to ‘phone home.’

I just hope none of them apply for work. Turn up for a job interview without knowing who sent you, why you’re there or when you were last employed and they’d think you were lying. Either that or they’d offer you the chief executive’s role.