I’M TOLD the long-awaited Alderley Edge Bypass will be single lane in both directions. Say it isn’t true, Ethel.
I can’t believe after 40 years of arguing and debating, the best solution to Alderley’s chronic traffic problem is a one-lane road, it's hardly worth bothering. You couldn’t transport Wayne Rooney’s salary down that.
A single-track road may have been a good idea in 1960, but things have moved on. Some of the cars cruising around Alderley these days need a lane of their own, and how will it accommodate all those thundering great Euro juggernauts we see rumbling down our highways?
Unless it has emergency lanes in both directions, the new bypass is going to be blocked more than the Freedom of Information Act, and how’s Sir Alex going to make it to the toilet without a hard shoulder? Has anyone considered that?
Maybe there’s a trendy move to horsedrawn transport with WAGS travelling in carriages attended by footmen (or footy men)?
"One has arrived at the pub, mi lady."
Look, if Alderley really must have a single lane highway, let’s have it in keeping.
Spray it orange.
The views on this page are Vic Barlow's and not necessarily those of the Express
