I was mesmerised by the prospect of Cheshire police staging a ‘grudge’ cricket match between detectives and bobbies.
As it takes 25 minutes for an officer to sprint the 200 yards from the station to the nearest armed robbery I’d say runs would be in short supply.
Given the current response times the chances of a swift catch at slip are negligible (unless they play with a balloon).
I don’t think we’ll see any ‘fast’ bowlers although there might be a few googlies on the field.
I can see why they want to play cricket. All that tea and cakes. They’re brilliant at tea and cakes. There probably isn’t an athlete in the country who can do tea and cakes like Cheshire Police.
As for a ‘grudge’ match, can you imagine?
"LBW, umpire?"
"Not out."
"What do you mean, not out?"
"For LBW the ball has to hit the batsman’s leg."
"I know that."
"So, why is it embedded in his helmet?"
The Crown Prosecution Service was always going to have its hands full with this one.
It was however, in support of our wounded soldiers so if the organisers care to contact me I’ll gladly bowl in a tenner.
Howzat?
The views on this page are Vic Barlow's and not necessarily those of the Express
