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All those in favour of dogs wearing nappies say “Aye”

Vic Barlow
11/10/2006

IT APPEARS Macclesfield Borough Council are now considering the sale of leisure services to outside contractors. The housing stock is already sold and with rumours rife about the future of waste management I wonder what councillors will have left to talk about:

Leader Fitzgerald: "Can we commence tonight's meeting?"

Councillor Stephenson: "I'd like to know what's to be done about the dog poo around Wilmslow?"

Leader Fitzgerald: "We plan to sweep it into one large heap."

Councillor Stephenson: "Well, step on it."

Councillor Claro: "Resign , resign."

Councillor Arnold: "Come now, councillors, this is a serious issue on which the Liberal Democrats are absolutely determined to... sit on the fence."

Councillor Murphy: "It'll be safer than dragging your feet."

Leader Fitzgerald: "Horse manure isn't too bad it's dog dirt that's so objectionable.

Councillor Claro: "Dogist!"

Councillor Jackson: "I think we need to recognise that many of the offending dogs are from single pet homes with no access to Andrex or Pedigree Chum."

Councillor Wright: "Why don't we make dogs wear nappies?"

Councillor Claro: "That is in total breach of the Canine Rights Act 1997."

Leader Fitzgerald: "What we shall do is set up a sub-committee to report back to this assembly no later than next December, or the December after that."

Conservatives: "Here. Here."

Leader Fitzgerald: "Now, let us move on. Item two on the Agenda: Dog Do in the Park or is it Party in the Poo?"

• THE views expressed on this page are those of Vic Barlow and do not necessarily reflect the views of the Express.

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