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Are workmen on another planet?

Vic Barlow
30/ 4/2008

DRIVING into Macclesfield yesterday morning, I encountered a team of workmen erecting temporary traffic lights on Byrons Lane. When I returned at 3pm, the lights were working, but the men were not.

I queued at those lights in the rush-hour traffic today, but workers were there no. Now I don’t want to be alarmist, but is it possible these ‘workmen’ have been abducted by aliens eager to learn how to disrupt intergalactic travel?

"Tell us the secrets of your traffic jams, earthlings."

"Not much to it, mate. Turn up when the mood takes you. Close down one side of the road. Stick up a set of lights. Job’s a good’un."

"Who do you inform?"

"Nobody."

"And who inspects and monitors your progress?"

"Nobody."

"And what about the welfare of other earthlings?"

"Never give it a thought, mate."

"And you expect us to believe such idiotic babbling?"

"That’s the way we do it, mate."

"Exterminate!"

The views expressed on this page are Vic Barlow's and not necessarily those of the Express

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